Do You Know Your and Your Partner's Love Language?

There may come a time where you can’t seem to get through to your partner. You pour your heart out to them, but your words fall short. It’s almost like you’re speaking a different language! When it comes to love, there are different languages, and one expression of love might not resonate with the other person.

Partners can strengthen their relationship by learning each other’s love languages. This can help bridge the gap in communication and reach a level of intimacy neither of you have experienced before. Discover the five love languages and how they can deepen the bond between you and your partner.

What are the five love languages?

A “love language” is how someone prefers to give and receive love. The concept was made popular by Dr. Gary Chapman’s book called The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts. Love languages are mostly discussed in the context of romantic relationships, but they also apply to relationships with your friends, family and peers.

There are five known love languages: words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service and giving/receiving gifts. While you may resonate with one love language the most, nearly everyone experiences love through all the languages to some extent. It’s also worth noting that a person might give and receive love using two different languages.

Here’s a brief overview of the five love languages:

  • Words of affirmation: This language is all about the verbal expression of love. A person who resonates with words of affirmation feels the most loved when their partner articulates what they like about them. Words of affirmation can also include general kindness and encouragement during hard times.
  • Quality time: For some partners, the ultimate act of love is spending time with each other. They place a lot of value in sharing the same physical space. It doesn’t matter what the activity is, as long as the couple is enjoying it together. Some couples can go hours without exchanging words because they’re perfectly content to be in the same room.
  • Physical touch: Many express love by physically interacting with their partners. These individuals feel a strong desire to sit close to their partners at all times. Physical touch doesn’t have to be sexual, either. Partners might also enjoy hugs, handholding or placing an arm around their shoulder.
  • Acts of service: People with this love language show their appreciation by lending a helping hand. They seek to make their partner’s life easier by crossing items off their to-do list. Someone who resonates with acts of service will surprise their partner by making dinner, taking out the garbage or filling their car with gas.
  • Giving/receiving gifts: Some partners show their love through tangible possessions. It doesn’t have to be a holiday or someone’s birthday. They’ll find little gifts for their loved ones simply because they felt like it. The amount of money spent matters far less than the sentimental meaning behind the gift.


Benefits of expressing your love languages

Couples should get to know each other’s love languages, especially if they give and receive love in different ways. Understanding the other person’s love language opens the door to communication and lays a solid foundation for a healthy relationship.

Here are some of the other benefits of sharing your love languages with one another:

  • Greater intimacy: Couples who learn each other’s love languages experience more intimacy, both physically and emotionally. Practicing your partner’s love language can lead to more intimacy because you’re communicating love in a way they understand. Love languages can help couples form deeper connections and increase the desire to be around each other.
  • Increased libido: Love languages are effective tools that can help women overcome a low libido. Sometimes, a woman can develop a low libido due to lack of communication with her partner. When couples express their likes and dislikes, they’ll discover what they need to reignite that passion.
  • Mutual empathy: Learning your partner’s love language helps you view interactions from their perspective. You’ll understand how their needs differ from your own, and you’ll gain the tools to fulfill those needs. Love languages help people step outside of themselves and become more attuned with what the other person is feeling.

Love languages are part of every relationship. You and your partner could share the same one, or your love languages could be entirely different. No matter what your love languages are, partners can build a successful relationship when they take the time to understand each other.

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